Monday, June 28, 2004


I felt the need to buy items of large clothing today since I am growing out of all the stuff that I bought a few weeks ago - the stuff that I thought would last me awhile. There is a lack of decent options for maternity clothing so I was looking in larger women's sizes of non-maternity clothing. I had decided that I needed several big, if not gigantic, items of clothing. Given the increasing size of the average American, this should not have been hard to pull off. But apparently they beat me to the clothing racks.

Upon reflection, though, I realized where I could probably find a big pair of sweatpants, a big zip-up sweatshirt, along with various other big items of clothing: BIG K-Mart! So I checked it out and found most of what I was looking for.

The maternity section at Big K-Mart consisted of three racks of clothing, with each garment being surprizingly unattractive. As I shopped, I witnessed several pregnant women hopefully checking the clothing in the maternity secion, only to be disappointed. That's because I beat them to the clothing racks.

When I am looking at maternity clothes I make a variety of faces, mostly for my own entertainment. These facial expressions range anywhere from disgust to amusement at the things clothing designers expect pregnant women to wear. But then I realize that I DON'T LIKE ANYTHING THEY HAVE AND I'M RUNNING OUT OF ROOM IN HERE, and the panic sets in. Lifelong, dearly held fashion principles are compromised by pregnant women, and I finally understand why, as the alternative to buying these horrible clothes is running around in a housedress, which is fashion suicide. I actually found myself remarking to a friend, "This tank top isn't too objectionable. I would be willing to wear it!"

Hopefully my maternity clothing shopping days are almost over, since I now have everything I need to get by, except for a gigantic skirt and a gigantic coat. If there's a Gigantic K-Mart anywhere, I suppose I should check there first....