Wednesday, February 09, 2005

Well, forget about the idea I had of separating my blogs by subject. I may never have a separate blog about being a parent with ADHD. How naiive of me to think that I would have a life other than being a parent. I don't even have time to have ADD anymore!

So much for the separate blogs. Mostly it's the annoyance of having to compartmentalize my posts, when I can't even organize my thoughts well enough to order from a menu, etc. The lack of sleep is something you hear about, but wow, it's really something.

No wonder people have more than one child on purpose. The whole experience is set up to make you forget the bad stuff. If you are so sleep deprived that you can't remember your child's first year, of course you feel that you want another baby - but that feeling is does not come from missing out on anything. You just can't remember any of it when it's over.

I watched the birth video - another period of time during which the brain is bombarded with hormones to make you forget. And thank goodness the lighting was bad so I can't see much of anything on the video. Plus, my mom managed to shoot the whole thing with the camcorder turned to one side. It discourages repeat viewings.

This week we experienced baby's first cold, which was truly horrible. She cried for an entire day, barely sleeping or eating. It seemed like she thought I should do something to help her, because that's what babies expect from their mothers. If your diaper is poopy, she's the one you yell at. Then she fixes the problem. Well, I couldn't fix the problem and it took her an entire day to give up on the yelling. And it made feel like I was responsible. This is where I feel OK about it because, unlike me, she will remember NOTHING about this time of her life. I wonder what's up with that. She's getting enough sleep.